I don’t know where to start. Where do you go after you find out that your eyes are really loud and shouty?

So, life continues for us home bods living it Large in Sicily. I use the term Large loosely as we’ve been generally house bound the last couple of days thanks to some proper rain.

Thankfully supermarkets are covered so we can stay dry but I’m bored of shopping. I don’t think the boys are falling for my high pitch screech exclaiming that “it’ll be exciting” anymore either. Damn.

We had a quick and interesting run to the mall earlier. I only needed an ATM but it turns out that just because there’s a bank up the road doesn’t mean there’s a way of getting cash out of it. At least there isn’t any way if you don’t want to talk to a person.

Thanks to Google Maps I found an ATM 14 minutes away. In the car….. at a mall…. The shouty levels increased with pleas to be quiet as Mummy had to concentrate.

We had to rush as a lovely lady was coming to collect my laundry at 10.30am. I should explain that as of yet I haven’t got a washing machine in my fully furnished apartment and I gave Dave the last of my cash thinking it would be ok.

Turns out that my Bluetooth connection gets all funny when I receive an incoming call. Sat nag lady got cut short in her prime and decided that she didn’t want to talk to any more. I was flying solo. As I’m writing this you’ll be pleased to note. We didn’t die.

I still need to go to the store to get dinner. Bugger!

I nearly got sold a mobile phone. Ridiculously most Italian words previously learnt left my body and all I could say, luckily in Italian, was I’m from England! It’s people like me that give English people a bad rap. Next thing you know I’ll be saying “meo no speako Italiano guvnoro”.

The laundry has gone to be taken care of by a lovely American lady. This means that in 2 days Dave can have good “posh pants” back for work and not the sort that act merely as an obstacle for free roaming testicles whose sole purpose it is to be free or get squashed between said lose pants and your though causing, so I’m told, crippling pain.

Apparently my washing is going to be returned smelling of wild Orchid. Better than the state they went in.

All this domesticity is tiring me out.

I ought to mention that the flappy bumper of the hire car Dave alluded to has been fixed. Turns out all it needed was a good push into a garage wall whilst reversing into the garage. Perfecto! No need for bluetac.

What we do need is another hire car from Sunday. Our Mini moo is still parked in good ole Blighty. At this rate we’ll be back before she leaves. I’m really glad I packed it full to the brim with useless stuff we won’t need.

Anyway, I either need a nap or to go to the store to buy dinner so best crack on as one of those most definitely has to happen before Dave gets home in two hours.

Ciao for now peeps.



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