Would you Adam and Eve it, I’ve got a cold. Not just any cold one that leaves you with snot trails and the look of a tramp having a bad hair day. One that makes your significant other question their future.

What I don’t get though is the how or why?

I know how and why you catch them back in Blighty and all the technical “airborne virus” type reasons. Your Kids are at school, it’s expected. You work with lots of people with questionable hygiene habits. (Just so any of my precious UOR colleagues know, your hygiene was impeccable which is impressive considering ;’) ) but here in Sicily I haven’t come across the factors that would bring such illness to my nasal passages.

1) The heat, up until recently we’ve had temperatures in the mid 20s, now it’s less but still much warmer than the UK. It’s not variable either. Steady all the way. Rain is kept to during the night therefore I have not exposed myself to wet/dry conditions.

2) The Raptors haven’t made it to School yet so they are disease free

3) I have not been in contact with anyone presenting any such symptoms. Well I say anyone, Dave announces most mornings that he’s ill and has a cold however this has disappeared by about 12 noon. Therefore for the sake of this process I shall discount him.

There must be some other Evil at work?

The Sicilians and their Superstitions, are they right?

You see, despite how us Brits feel about the temperature, it’s apparently Winter. Yes people 20° is Winter. Therefore you should dress appropriately. We ventured into the local shopping mall after Windsurfing at the weekend. All dressed in our finest Summer attire. You should have seen the looks we got. Pure and utter disgust. No offence is taken, we know were flouting the rules. The other option is to dress appropriately and sweat like a Camels arse.

Maybe they’re right though? Perhaps it is too cold.

Going out of the house with wet hair is asking for trouble. A strong wind could come, give you a chill and it’s game over. Death. Let me say I am so lazy, with two children to care for, drying hair is a luxury I don’t have and we’ll letting things dry naturally has got to be much better. Turns out probably not. Death is knocking at my door for flouting the wet hair rules.

Wearing black, it should only be worn when in mourning, if you’re not then misfortunes will befall you. I live in black. When your arse is trailing 6ft behind you, you need to try everything possible to disguise it. Could this cold be my misfortunes be falling?

What else is there? Oh yeah,

Don’t open Windows, ooops.

Ice cold water can damage your throat, well that explains that pain.

Always wear a coat or sweater other wise you could develop pneumonia. Well at least I have a diagnosis for my flippant behaviour.

So there we have it. As much as we flout our elders superstitions, it would appear in this instance it’s given me the plague tinged with pneumonia and a sore throat.

You can guarantee as I sit here in my strikingly hot apartment dressed all in Gray, my hair all dry and my sweater all snug and hot, I shall not be so flippant next time. It may be too late for me but I hope, dear people, you will heed such wise words from thos3 crazy people and their witchcraft.

Just incase there is a chance, I’m currently drinking Lemon Honey Tea from Mount Etna. It’s well delicious and Mother Google said Honey, Lemon and tea combined will ward off evil spirits.

In other news, Dave still hasn’t found his balance. At 44, I fear it may be lost forever but in the mean time for us that watch from the shore, we have some guaranteed quality entertainment.

The boys aren’t in School as mentioned previously. This is now thanks for the Drs surgery at home not being able to work their email system. I should have known better considering I’d been going there for 4 years and it was only in the last 6 months they figured out how to pick up a phone.

I’ve bought a lot of unnecessary furniture to make the apartment seem more homely. It’s not met with a warm reception from he indoors. At least he’s purchased some Elastic band type device to hang off the bedroom door handle in the hope that one day his 44 year old body will want to look like John Cena and stretch it. At least it will go with the 2 wetsuits he’s purchased for next year.

We’ve been invited to one of Dave’s work nights out. Let me tell you though I’m unsure whether the boys and I will go. I made the silly mistake of asking Dave if he wanted us to go. He’s 50/50 apparently. Cheers mate! I think we shall attend but mainly to spite him. Arse…. 😉

That’s about it really. I still don’t have a dog because I’m not allowed. Those poor stray puppies with no one to love. Seriously though people, all those puppy breeders back in the UK need to come here. In Sicily you don’t have the animal shelters to hide these poor animals from view. To be someone elses problem to deal with. They’re everywhere. Even laying on the side of the roads having been hit by some vehicle and left. It’s so heart breaking.

On that note I need to go and bar the door, the grim reaper is knocking to come in again.

Ciao peeps.

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